You might be a Jewish Redneck if...

Date Received: Thu, 24 Feb 2000


  1. You think a hora is a high priced call girl.
  2. You light your Shabbat candles from your cigarette.
  3. Your belt buckle is bigger than a yarmulke.
  4. Instead of a noisemaker, you've fired a shotgun at the sound of Haman's name.
  5. You have a gun rack in your sukkah.
  6. You think KKK is a symbol for Kosher.
  7. You think marrying your first cousin is required according to Jewish law.
  8. You don't ride on Shabbat because your car is up on blocks.
  9. When someone shouts "l'chaim!" you respond "l'howdy!"
  10. You are saving a bottle of Mogen David for a special occasion.
  11. Your favorite beverage is a combination of Manischewitz & Mountain Dew, better known as "Mountain Jew"

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