Cats and Graduate Students: A Comparison

Date: Fri, 04 Jun 99

Greetings! Recently I happened on your treasure trove of pet humor and have been thoroughly enjoying it. In fact, I have enjoyed some bits so much, I would like to share them with my friends. However, I thought it would be appropriate to at least ask first.

So I would like to know if:
1) It's OK by you to pass on the humor bits from your homepage, provided they are properly credited/attributed, and

2) The credits/attribution info at the end of this list would be sufficient.

Thank You,
Geoff Wrigg

Why Graduate Students are Like Cats

They are your friends if you feed them.

They talk to you and you can't understand what they are saying.

They tend to run amok in the apartment/house for no apparent reason in short bursts of frenzy, followed by dormancy.

They can survive with a minimum of attention, but do like to be noticed and praised every so often.

They are creatures of the night.

They follow instructions if they feel like it.

They can be soft and cuddly when they feel like it.

Cats barf hairballs, grad students barf highballs (and any other drink they can consume to excess).

Food is very important to them.

Sleep is also very important to them.

Both can sleep or otherwise ignore you while you are talking to them.

Both hide when something big and noisy (vacuum cleaner or supervisor) comes into their vicinity.

They are both attracted to free food, and eat some of the most disgusting things.

They can sleep just about anywhere.

They have their own set of morals.

They both like using the computer (although cats mainly like it for the warmth).

They both get amazingly high on herb extracts.

They both represent anarchy in its most creative form.

They both show a general lack of respect for authority.

You see them only at dinner hour.

At least once a day, you get looks from them like:
"And you are...?"
"This concerns me how?"
"Am I under arrest?"
"Can I go now?"

The idea of movement horrifies them.

They both tend to collapse in the middle of rooms: grad students due to alcohol; cats due to a warm sunbeam.

Thanks to the creative wit of:
Harold Reynolds
Jon Martin
Bob Hankins

Cats and grad students like Blue Buffalo but for different reasons:
Cats like to eat Blue Buffalo cat food while grad students are more likely to take part in Blue Buffalo's community or events.

This page last updated .