Star Trek: The Next Generation The Canonical Drinking Game

Date Received: Thu, 6 Oct 1994

Compiled by: Mark Yocom

Special Thanks To: Raymond Chen Christopher Becker Pat (SPAM) John Graziano Robert Tarr John Connelly Michael McDaniel Stan Paszt Alpha Theta Coeducational Fraternity [Electro Productions] Scott Parish Stefanie L. Lawson Raoul Rodriguez Donald Simmons Joshua A. Laff
Requirements: Episode(s) of ST:TNG
This list
People (the more the merrier)
Beverages of your choice

Instructions: Simple. Watch the show, and whenever a condition is met, take the appropriate number of drinks. The definition of "drink" should be decided before game play starts. Usually, a good mouthful will suffice. Optional rules are included at the end of the list for fun variations on the "standard" game.

Compiler's Note: I would advise taking some time before game play starts to decide which conditions to use and which to ignore. Remember that this list is canonical, so you probably will _not_ want to use them all (especially with a new episode, since you'll spend all your time reading the list, rather than watching). Please send any corrections, suggestions, requests, submissions, flames, etc. to the address listed above.

General Quotes

ConditionNumber of Drinks
"Open hailing frequencies"1
"Medical emergency"1
"Belay that order"1
"Hell", "Damn" and other swearing.
SEE ALSO: Riker's special swearing rules.
"It's not like anything I've ever seen before"1
"Impossible" while watching the "impossible"2
"Shut up, Wesley"3
"On screen"1
"Set phasers on..."1
"Priority One"1
"Just a little more time...!"1
"Eastern/Western/Southern/Northern Continent"2
"The Klingon Home Planet" or other reference
without actually giving it a name

General Actions

"Ensign Ethnic" or "Ensign Buxom" gets a line1
A bad fight scene occurs1
A bridge officer is seen in casual clothes SEE ALSO: Picard's & Beverly's special clothing rules.1 ea.
A bridge officer is seen in dress uniform1 ea.
A Captain's Log entry is made by someone other than Picard2
A crewmember drinks (outside of 10 Forward) SEE ALSO: Picard's special drinking rules.1 ea.
A crewmember straightens his/her uniform SEE ALSO: Picard's special uniform rules.1 ea.
A desk hologram is seen2
A female crewmember has flawless makeup after she's been put through the wringer1
A guest appearance is made by someone from TOS3
A log entry is made - not by Picard2
A log entry is made1
A member of the bridge crew looks WAY too pleased with him/herself1
A member of the bridge crew takes over a by pushing someone out of the way2
A new alien also has differently shaped hands1
A new alien doesn't have latex on its forehead2
A new alien has latex on its forehead1
A new alien ship is revealed1
A poker game is shown1
A principle character is put on trial1
A probe is launched1
A shuttlecraft appears unsafe1
A shuttlecraft is launched2
A sound effect from TOS is heard1
A star returns from the deadWhole Beverage
A stardate is mentioned - not in a log entry1
A succession of five face closeups with no dialogue1
A token alien is shown in the background and has no lines1
The token alien is a Vulcan2
An "expendable" is killed1 ea.
An "Old Earth Saying" is brought up1
An Old Earth Date is mentioned2
Ancient alien technology screws things up1
Another Captain or Starfleet Command officer is shown1
Bridge command is handed over1
Communications malfunction/go out1
Communicators are out of range2
Communicators don't work1
Dialogue in the turbolift1
English is spoken by Klingons when they are alone and have no reason to speak English2
First names while sexual tension present2
Harmonics are changed in shields/phasers/etc.1
Holodeck characters become aware of their own ephemerality2
Intruder Alert3
Klingon is spoken1
Mention of dilithium crystals1
Nobody leaves the ship, but we still see more than one room of the alien ship/planet/etc2
Part of a set is destroyed in a fistfight2
Phasers are used for a different function than intended (e.g. overload, power a transporter, etc.)1
Picard or Riker order a course change by exact X, Y, and Z coordinates, rather than something like "Set course for Starbase 8"3
Readings go off the scale1
Red Alert2
Security alert or request1
Someone adopts a persona (Dixon Hill, Sherlock Holmes, etc.)1 ea.
Someone alludes to a work/person/event/etc. that hasn't been made/existed/happened yet1
Someone brings up the matter/antimatter ratio1
Someone changes their pronunciation of a word within the same scene1
Someone gives their communicator to a non-crewmember so they can communicate with the Enterprise3
Someone implies that 10 Forward is a Happening Place1
Someone is referred to by their first name1
Someone is seen out of uniform (in civvies)2
Someone is transported to somewhere other than a transporter room or sickbay from somewhere other than a transporter room2
Someone mentions Jack Crusher2
Someone other than Picard preaches the P.D.2
Someone places their communicator on something so it can be beamed away or destroyed2
Someone preaches about "Humanity's Unique Potential"1
Someone preaches the Prime Directive1
Someone quotes Shakespeare, etc. (See Picard)1
Someone reads a book1
Someone receives a shot1
Someone receives a shot from a non-medical officer2
Someone removes their communicator1
Someone requests magnification when it's painfully obvious that it's necessary2
Someone requests that an image on the main viewer be magnified1
Someone stops the countdown2
Someone throws/is hit by/etc. styrofoam props1
Someone uses the episode's title in a sentence2
Someone wakes up from a nightmare1
Someone who normally pronounces "sensors" as "SEN-sers" pronounces it as "SEN-sohrs"1
Something escapes the sensors1
Something escapes the sensors and they use the word "interference" as an excuse2
The auto-destruct sequence is activated3
The battle bridge is used1
The battle bridge is used with the saucer section still attached2
The bridge crew contemplates mutiny3
The camera pans > 90 degrees to show how BIG the ship is1
The computer makes that "I'm listening" chirp1
The Enterprise actually fights (shots must be fired)2
The Enterprise avoids a conflict rather than using force1
The Enterprise docks at a starbase3
The Enterprise encounters an unknown energy form1
The Enterprise is boarded by hostiles2
The Enterprise is captured in a nebula/cloud1
The Enterprise is hurled somewhere by another force (Q, Tin Man, etc.)2
The Enterprise is taken over1
The holodeck appears in its "natural" state2
The matte painting has a moving ground vehicle2
The same matte painting of an alien planet is used after each commercial break1
The sarcophagus is used in sickbay2
The saucer section separatesWhole Beverage
The ship/crew is seconds away from disaster1
The transporter room can't lock on to someone1
The transporter room pulls someone through after their ship explodes2
The warp engine light goes really fast2
The weapons are rendered useless1
There is a countdown1
They contact someone via communicator or intercom without activating it1
They fade to commercial playing the "ominous horns"1
They fade to commercial with a soap-opera-like close up on someone's face1
TNG contradicts a fact stated in TOS2
Transporter goes down1
Transporter Room 3 is used1
Yellow Alert1

Picard Quotes

"Captain's Log"1
"Captain's Log, Supplemental"2
"Come" (in personal quarters)2
"Make it so"1
"Number One"1
"The boy" in reference to Wesley1

Picard Actions

Accident or attack draws blood3
Appears uncomfortable (around women, children)1
Calls a meeting in the middle of a crisis2
Calls a meeting1
CriesWhole Beverage
Demonstrates knowledge of a foreign language1
Drinks tea identified as Earl Grey4
Drinks tea3
Has an accident or is attacked2
Is called upon to mediate a dispute2
Is possessed4
Is seen on the bridge out of uniform2
Leaves the bridge during a crisis to talk with Dr. Crusher or Guinan1
Leaves the ship to lead an away team2
Leaves the ship1
Makes a speech that saves the day1
Quotes Shakespeare, etc.2
Requests a Level One Diagnostic1
Straightens his uniform before giving a speech3
Straightens his uniform2
Swears/hurls an insult in a foreign language2
Takes a communique from Starfleet in his ready room1
Takes the helm in a tricky situation3
Talks about death to Dr. Crusher1
Tries to avoid Lwuxana Troi1
Wears chest-revealing bedwear2

Worf Quotes

"Grrrrr" (A simple sneer qualifies)1
"I am a Klingon"1
"Klingons do NOT..."1
"Security Override!"2
"Human women are too fragile"2

Worf Actions

Actually wins a fight2
Asks for an explanation of a human term/custom1
Fusses about his discommendation2
Gets beat up1
Has a suggestion shot down offhandedly2
Has an understated romantic sequence with Troi2
Makes a reference to his sexual prowess2
Mentions or participates in some bizarre Klingon ritual2
Says something with a tilt of his head/nod1
Throws someone in the brig/Arrests someone1
Tries to commit suicide3
Uses the word "human" in a sense meaning puny, weak, or otherwise not Klingon2

Data Quotes

"I am an android"1
"I cannot feel emotions", etc1
"Increase speed"1

Data Actions

Affects a human mannerism (e.g. Sherlock Data)2
Brent Spiner breaks character for comic effect1
Corrects somebody's grammar1
Does that little head twitch1
Gets kissed, etc.3
Gives a list of synonyms for the term he did not understand1
Gives an "approximation" out to several decimal places1
Has to have "An Old Earth Saying" explained2
Innards are revealed other than his head2
Innards are revealed1
Is "used" to save the ship, beam down, or hang around infected people because the situation is too dangerous for humans3
Is able to interpret/use alien technology in no time1
Is cut off during a list of synonyms2
Is cut off mid-sentence1
Is told that he's more human than he thinks2
Stops himself during an inappropriate speech2
Uses a contractionWhole Beverage
Uses a new colloquialism1
Uses his strength and shows up Worf2
Uses his strength1
Uses his superior android speed1

Riker Quotes

"What the hell is going on?"Whole Beverage
"You are personally responsible for the Captain's safety" to Worf2
"With pleasure, sir"1

Riker Actions

Acts blatantly like Kirk1
Demonstrates knowledge of a foreign language1
Gets that annoying smirk on his face1
Gets the girl for no apparent reason2
Gets the girl1
Pronounces a word in a way that does not match his heritage (e.g. charade=shur-AHD)2
Stands with his feet more than 2 ft. apart per ' beyond 2'1
Swears/hurls an insult in a foreign language2
Thrusts his chin out with a smug look1
Walks forward as if he's trying to knock an imaginary door down with his forehead1

LaForge Quotes

"...lost a lotta good people down there..."1
"Maybe not" in response to "Impossible"2
"I'm workin' on it!"1

LaForge Actions

Interacts with a woman (real or not) in the holodeck2
Is used as a "human tricorder"1
Sees with his own eyes (VISORless)Whole Beverage
Tweaks the warp engines/shields/tractor beams1
VISOR is taken or knocked off1
Wishes he had human vision1

Beverly Quotes

"He's dead (pause)"1
"He's gone..."2
"Nothing yet, but we're working on it"1
"This man is dying!"3
"This shouldn't be happening"1
"This won't hurt a bit"1

Beverly Actions

Appears without her lab coat in sickbay2
Appears without her lab coat1
Beams directly to sickbay or orders someone to be beamed directly to sickbay1
Can't figure out some bizarre medical problem1
Diagnoses something really obvious1
Is seen in a sweater2
Is seen on the bridge for no apparent reason1
Loses a patient2
Performs major surgery2
Shows maternal instinct2
Uses one of her ridiculous 24th century medical terms1
Uses the word "stumped" in regards to problem2

Deanna Quotes

"What do YOU think about that?" or other quote reminiscent of ELIZA1
"Are you troubled?" (when they obviously are)1
"Mother! Please...!"1

Deanna Actions

Can't shut out all the feelings1
Gives us Betazoid insight into something really obvious2
Has some sort of delusion that she and Worf are lovers.2
Is hit on1
Rolls her eyes1
Senses (and lists) more than one emotion1
Senses something really shocking1

O'Brien Actions

Has a line in a first or second season episode1
Disables a weapon during transport1

Wesley Quotes

"It's easy!" (or "simple", etc.)1
"Wow", "Gee", "Ooh", etc.1

Wesley Actions

Appears to be hitting on someone1
Creates some spiffy new science project1
Gets that "I'm not just a kid" attitude1
Gets that annoying "impish" grin1
Has his life threatened and he diesParty like it's 1999!
Has his life threatened2
Is seen with a girl (other than when on duty)3
Saves the day and nobody thanks him2
Saves the day and nobody understands his pseudoscientific babbling2
Saves the day1
Swallows really hard1
Talks back to his mom1

Lwuxana Quotes and Actions

"Little One" in reference to Deanna1
Is referred to in an episode in which she does not appear1
Reads Picard's mind (or pretends to)1

Tasha Yar Actions

Decks someone just to show her strength, etc.2
Decks someone1
Denise Crosby makes a guest appearance1
Gets desire fulfilledWhole Beverage
Shows sexual desire3
Suggests that the Enterprise fight, upon meeting another ship, etc.1


Calls Data "it" or accuses him of being unable to do something because he's an android1
Cuts Picard off1
Mispronounces Data's name1


Makes someone sigh at the end of a talk1
Talks about "her people"1


"Engage", "Make It So", "Energize", "Accessing", "On Screen" and "Magnify" are shot words - you must take a drink unless you say the exact word _in unison_ with the dialogue. Two drinks if you say the wrong word.

Whenever Riker appears in a scene, the last person to say "Oink Oink" takes a drink.

If Troi "senses" something, everyone must stick a finger down their throats and make gagging sounds - last one to do so takes a drink. (This one could be dangerous in the latter stages of the game.)

At the start of a commercial break, guess who will do the next log entry. Take a drink if you're wrong. If there's no log entry, everyone drinks.

When Data launches into a long explanation, the last person to interrupt with "Thank you, Commander..." takes a drink. Doesn't count if you say it after it's said on the screen.

Whenever Wesley saves the ship, throw something at the TV. Take a drink if you don't hit Wesley.

Before the show, everyone predicts Dr. Crusher's hairstyle. Everyone who is wrong has to take a drink.

Whenever Troi gets a headache, drink until the headache subsides.

Before the show, everyone predicts Guinan's hat style (stop sign or teardrop). Everyone who is wrong has to take a drink.

Whenever Data embarasses himself, drink until somebody stops him.

Remember, friends don't let friends drink and drive!

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