Baseball
- All Out: Baseball teams should try hard to win, but they shouldn't go all out.
- Arby Eyes: Mr. Arby needs his RBIs to see with.
- Ball (1): A fancy-dress dance for baseball players is called a ball.
- Baseball: When Billy struck out, he cried, so the sport was called basebawl.
- Batted: What do you think would happen if a baseball player batted his/her eyelashes at the pitcher?
- Batter: To make baseball cookies, small pieces of batter are put in the oven to bake.
- Bleachers: Baseball fans who make their hair unnaturally blonde are bleachers.
- Call Out: Baseball umpires are also social reformers because they keep calling people out for stuff they do.
- Catcher: "The Kissing Bandit is on the field! She's heading for home plate!" "Well, catcher!"
- Chokes: Unfortunately there is no mass Heimlich maneuver to give a ball team when it chokes.
- Cleanup: The baseball player got the nickname "The Janitor" because he was always batting cleanup.
- Diamonds: Marilyn Monroe on baseball: "Diamonds are a girl's best friend."
- Empire (1): The story of a baseball official's addiction to lettuce was called "The Decline and Fall of the Romaine Umpire".
- Fouls: The pitcher became known as "Chicken" Little because batters kept hitting fouls off him.
- Homer (1): If baseball had been played in ancient Greece, would Homer have written "Casey at the Bat?"
- Inning: A baseball player's trip to a hotel could be called an inning.
- Love: When she accidentally beaned him with her catcher's mitt, he knew it was glove at first sight.
- Pitcher: Nothing beats the baseball field heat better than a tall cold pitcher of lemonade.
- Run: I can't go to the baseball game! My stocking has a run in it!
- Short Stop: To make a shortstop in an emergency, slam on the brakes.
- Stealing: Anywhere else but a ball park, stealing is a crime.
- Strike: Unhappy with their contract offer, the baseball players went on strike.
- Swing: It was when the late Benny Goodman picked up a bat that he became the King of Swing.
- Three Strikes and You're Out: How does a baseball player escape from jail? Three strikes and he's out!
- Throw Out: The baseball team's pitcher became known as the Trash Collector because she kept throwing people out.
Basketball
- Ball: Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She ran away from the ball.
- Hoopla: Basketball excitement: Hoopla.
- Leia [Princess]: The Star Wars character who was most into basketball was Princess Lay-Up.
- Tip-Off: What happens when a detective who plays basketball gets a tip-off?
Football
- Bares: The most unclothed football team: Bears.
- Browns: If musicians sing the blues, couch potatoes must sing the Browns.
- Buck an Ears: To raise money for the team, its players sell corn for $1 an ear, hence the team name Buccaneers.
- Cardinal: Greed, sloth, gluttony and disliking pun tests are all considered Cardinal sins.
- Chargers: A latter-day Light Brigade might be formed from the Chargers.
- Coat: The best way to win at football in Indianapolis is to wear an over-Colt.
- Cowboys: If any football team will give you a bum steer, it is this one: Cowboys
- Dolphins: Sailors watch this team while at sea to bring luck: Dolphins.
- Eagles: If seagulls fly over the "C", do Eagles fly over the "E"?
- Fall Cons: The Autumn Football Swindles became known as the Falcons.
- Fee Fi Fo Fum: When a New York Giants receiver drops the football, is it called a Fee-Fi-Fo-Fumble?
- Pass: A quarterback's bad game in grammatical terms: Pass imperfect, future tense.
- Quarter Back: I loaned you 25 cents last week. I want my Quarterback right now.
- Raiders: Because of the fondness of its members for a brand of bug spray, this team was called the Raiders.
- Red Skins: Sunburned football fans have Redskins.
- Safety Matches: Fred plays the Safety position on the football team. When he said he'd check out Tinder for a Special Someone, Harold said, "Here you go, you'll find your flame here," and gave him some safety matches.
- Saints: The nicest, most caring people work for the Saints franchise.
- Stealers: Members of this team have a reputation for kleptomania: Steelers
Golf
- Birdie: The musical that most appeals to golfers who make bad shots is "Bye-Bye Birdie".
- Bogey: One tune never to whistle while you are on the golf course is "Colonel Bogey".
- Cádiz: If a golfer needs to find an assistant, a good place to start looking is Cádiz.
- Chip: An arborist who is bad at golf could be called a wood chipper.
- Chip In: How do golfers contribute to sports pools? They chip in.
- Club Sandwich: I put a putter between two slices of bread and got a club sandwich!
- Drive [golf]: Do golf club restaurants have drive-through windows?
- Driver (Golf Club): When a bunch of golfers go out on the town, do they have a designated driver?
- Fore Cast: I thought a forecast is what you get when you break a leg on the golf course.
- Foregone Conclusion: I shanked a golf ball deep into the rough. That it was lost was a fore-gone conclusion.
- Glub (1): What a golfer says when s/he sinks: Club.
- Hole in One (1): If a golf pro were to get a strike in bowling, would s/he call it a "bowl in one"?
- Hole in One (2): Why did the golfer get new socks? Because s/he got a hole in one!
- Putting on the Ritz: A green at an ultra-posh golf resort was so fancy that it got dubbed "The Ritz". The Management was Not Impressed when the patrons began singing and dancing "Putting on the Ritz."
- Tea: Something to drink while golfing: Tee.
- Wedge: Golf pranksters deliver sand wedgies.
Hockey
- Blues: The favourite colours of this hockey team are turquoise, aquamarine and navy, because they're Blues.
- Crease: A goalie is a sharp dresser if he a has nice crease in his trousers.
- For Ward: "Ward wants you to get some food from the store." "Ok, I'll do it forward."
- Goal (2): My goal in life is to play in the NHL.
- Icing: For hockey players, their favourite part of a cake is the icing.
- Leaves (1): The way some players behave on the ice Leafs much to be desired.
- North Stars: The members of the North Stars moonlight as ships navigator's helpers.
- Oilers: The Oilers hockey team is on call in case of a lubrication crisis.
- Pass: Why did the hockey player get slapped? He kept making passes at women.
- Pen Win: "I won this pen in a raffle." "I guess that makes you a penguin."
- Puck: Robin Goodfellow never liked playing hockey, because he was always the Puck.
- Rangers: When asked why the members of this team all wore Smokey the Bear uniforms, the captain said "We're the Rangers!"
- Ring: The overpaid hockey star bought an engagement rink for his sweetheart.
- Ruins: This hockey team is perpetually in a shambles: Bruins.
- Sabres: Members of the Sabres hockey team have the mistaken belief that the sword is mightier than the pun.
- Saves: What do you get when you cross an evangelist with a hockey puck? A puck that saves itself.
- Sharks [San José]: Never borrow money from hockey loan Sharks.
- Stanley: I heard Marvel Comics is the new main sponsor of the NHL. The champion now gets the Stan Lee Cup.
- Stick: An old-fashioned hockey player is a stick-in-the-mud.
- Stick: With what do hockey players glue things together? Their sticks.
- The Fence: We had to put up defence to keep da kids out of our yard.
Sports
- Bad Mint In: That mint is spoiled? Well, go put that badminton the trash.
- Ball Lots: Football, baseball, soccer, and basketball players (among others) are natural voters, since they play with a ballots.
- Bowled: He was so startled by his spare that he was bowled over.
- Box: "Do you want a box for these leftovers?" "No, but I'll wrestle you for them."
- Bronze [medal]: Why isn’t suntanning an Olympic sport? Because the best you can ever get is bronze.
- Course: Can Ronald Reagan eat a tennis ball? Of courts he can't.
- Fans: Why did the stadium get hot? Because all the fans left.
- Field: Sports grammar: Incorrect past tense of "to feel": Field.
- Flip: You shouldn't be flippant in judo class.
- Grand Slam: A Grand Slam is a big win or score in a sport, not closing a piano lid too hard.
- Overtime: Do players get time and a half if a game goes into overtime?
- Quiver: The prospect of getting a new container for my arrows has me quivering with excitement.
- Racket: Noisy tennis gangsters often get involved in this: Racket.
- Right Hook [boxing]: My pirate friend has taken up boxing. You should see his right hook.
- Scores: Classical composers like Verdi and Rossini would have been good at sports, as evidenced by the scores they created.
- Scratch [to sink the cue ball]: Never play pool when you're itchy, as you're sure to scratch.
- Shotput: Sports Mathematics: Golf + Marksmanship = Shot Putt.
- Skull: To use your head while rowing: Scull.
- Sock Her: Fran: "Sally hit Molly!" Jan: "I've been wanting to soccer myself for quite a while."
- Tackle: Fishing gear used to play football: Tackle.
- Take Up: I got bored during quarantine, so I decided to take up fencing. The neighbours keep demanding that I put it back.
- Ten Is: If we can't get twelve or eleven, tennis as good as any.
- Time to Spare: When a bowler is in a hurry, it's because s/he doesn't have time to spare.
- Turnover: The pastry that sports teams prefer to avoid is the turnover.
- Win-Free: What do the [losing team name] and Oprah have in common? They're both win-free.
Track and Field
- Discuss: Track and field atheletes are chatterboxes, always willing to discus anything.
- Her-dle: Married to a himdel: Hurdle.
- Pole Vault: I thought a pole vault was something you find in a bank in Warsaw.
- Vault: How a gymnast leaps over a bank: Vault.