Pun Dictionary: B Entries

A Bomb in a Bull (Jokes)
What do you call it when a bull eats a bomb? Abominable!
BA degree (Book Titles)
Good for a Placemat: B. A. Degree JG
Baa baa black sheep (Book Titles)
Songs For Children: Barbara Blacksheep JG
Baa-Steal Day (Misc)
On which holiday does the sheriff expect a spike in sheep rustling? Bastille Day.
Babble On (Middle East)
"The Geography prof is a real windbag." "Yes, he really likes to Babylon."
Babe Ruth (Hot Cross Puns)
What do you get when you cross a tree with a baseball player? Babe Root.
Baboon (Book Titles)
Monkey Shines: Bob Boone
Baby Buggy (Jokes)
What is a newly hatched beetle? A baby buggy.
Babylon (Tom Swifties)
"That city will NEVER be rebuilt," the prophets babble on.
Back (Anatomy)
A spinal surgeon's favourite movie is "Back to the Future".
Backup Plan (Expressions)
If the Great Escape requires that the car go into reverse, and the gear breaks, do you need a backup plan?
Bad Mint In (Sports)
That mint is spoiled? Well, go put that badminton the trash.
Badder (Anatomy)
Grammatically incorrect urology: bad, bladder, baddest.
Bag Dad (Middle East)
"Ask your father what he brought home from the store." "What's in the Baghdad?"
Bagel (Jokes)
If a seagull flies over the sea, what flies over the bay? A bagel.
Bah, Rain (Middle East)
What the campers say when the weather gets wet. "Bahrain!"
Bail [remove water] (Tom Swifties)
"This boat leaks," said Tom balefully.
Bail [to get out of jail] (Tom Swifties)
"I'll get you out of prison in no time," said Tom balefully.
Baited (Tom Swifties)
"I just swallowed a fishing lure," said Tom with baited breath.
Bakers Field (USA)
After the Great Open-Air Baking Competition, the meadow became known as the Bakersfield.
Balance (One-Liners)
I was at an ATM yesterday when a little old lady asked if I could check her balance, so I pushed her over.
Bald (Tom Swifties)
"I'm going to get a hair transplant," said Tom baldly.
Balder (One-Liners)
Was Baldur the ancient Norse god of hair loss?
Balderdash (One-Liners)
If I spouted nonsense about foot races of the Norse gods, would you call it Baldurdash?
Balefully (Tom Swifties)
"I just ate a block of hay," said Tom balefully.
Ball (1) (Baseball)
A fancy-dress dance for baseball players is called a ball.
Ball (2) (Tom Swifties)
"Take me to the dance," Mary bawled.
Ball Tick (Europe)
"That ball is a clock!" "Yes, I hear the Baltic too."
Balmer (Military)
A mortician with an explosive personality is an em-bomber.
Bambi (Hot Cross Puns)
What do you get when you cross a fawn with a hornet? Bambee.
Bamboo (Jokes)
What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost? Bamboo.
Bamboozled (Tom Swifties)
"I find panda food confusing," said Tom, bamboozled.OK
Ban Gore (USA)
"I refuse to allow slasher movies in my town!" "You mean you'll Bangor?"
Banana (Jokes)
What is a skeleton's favourite fruit? A bone-ana.
Bang [name for exclamation mark] (Tom Swifties)
"!" said Tom while banging his head.
Bang Galore (India)
At an Indian fireworks show, there are Bangalore.
Banjo (USA)
From a Geography song: "...I've come from Alabama with my Banjul on my knee."
Banks (Jokes)
Why are rivers always rich? Because they have two banks.
Banquet (Jokes)
To celebrate the grand re-opening of the First National Bank after the flood, they held a bank-wet.
Bar Bare (Tom Swifties)
"Those ballet students should be forced to do their exercises in the nude," said Tom barbarically.
Bar Talk (Music)
Conversation heard in a saloon: Bartok.
Barbarian (One-Liners)
An uncivilized hair stylist could be called a barberian.
Barbecue (Book Titles)
Outdoor Cookery: Barbie Cue JG
Barbed wire (Book Titles)
Keep Out!: Barb Dwyer JG
Barbels (One-Liners)
A ladies' glee club that performs in the lounges of fitness clubs could be called the Bar-Belles.
Barber (Tom Swifties)
"Boy, will I give YOU a haircut!" said Tom barbarously. Where do sheep get sheared? At the baa-baa shop.
Bare Minimum (One-Liners)
Is a midget mother in a bikini wearing the bare mini-mum required by decency?
Barely (Food)
When the silo blew up, the farmer barley escaped with his life.
Bares (Football)
The most unclothed football team: Bears.
Barium (Book Titles)
Drink this before the X-Ray: Barry Um
Bark (Trees/Shrubs)
Don't worry about the foresters. Their bark is worse than their bite.
Bark is Worse than Your Bite (Expressions)
I had to choose being a programmer over being a shipbuilder, because my barque is worse than my byte.
Barry (Food)
The famous fruit farmer turned musician: Berry Manilow.
Bartender (Book Titles)
Guide To Mixology: Bart Ender JG
Bartenter (One-Liners)
A termite walks into a bar and asks "Is the bar tender here?"
Baseball (Baseball)
When Billy struck out, he cried, so the sport was called basebawl.
Bash [a Unix shell] (Tom Swifties)
"I use the Bourne Again Shell," said Tom bashfully.
Bashfully (Tom Swifties)
"I keep bumping my head on things," said Tom bashfully.
Basic (Chemistry)
Studying the pH of solutions is a basic part of chemistry.
Basic [programming language] (Tom Swifties)
"This is the most common language used on micros," said Tom basically.
Basil (Europe: Switzerland)
Does the city of Basel have a lot of men named Herb?
Bass Line [music] (Music)
When do baseball players become musicians? When they're playing the base line.
Bassinet (One-Liners)
The best thing with which to catch fish is a baby's bed: a bassinet.
Bath (Europe: United Kingdom)
In Bath, everything comes out in the wash.
Bats (Jokes)
Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? Their bats flew away.
Batter (Baseball)
To make baseball cookies, small pieces of batter are put in the oven to bake. Cannibals should avoid mixing cake-baking with baseball, since they might put the wrong batter in the oven.
Battery (Cars)
She hit me with an Eveready, so I charged her with assault with battery.
Battin' (Asia: Philippines)
"Janet hit .675 in baseball today!" "That's a high Bataan average."
Bawdy House (Jokes)
A funeral director got busted on a prostitution-related charge - running a common body house.
Bay (Physical)
Do oceanographers prefer Bay windows?
Bay Root (Middle East)
That which keeps the bay plant from blowing away: Beirut.
BB gun (Book Titles)
Who Killed Cock Robin: B. B. Gunn JG
Be a beeman (Book Titles)
How to Make Honey: B. A. Beaman p
Be extravagant (Book Titles)
How to Go Broke Fast: B. X. Travagant JG
Be leaving (Tom Swifties)
"Get out of here!" said Tom believingly.
Be on time (Book Titles)
Not a Moment to Spare: B. N. Time JG
Beach (Trees/Shrubs)
A mid-Sixties teen movie was called Beech Blanket Bingo.
Bear (Animals)
All of these puns are getting hard to bear.
Bear Arms (Jokes)
The U.S. 2nd Amendment legalizes T-Shirts. Americans have the "right" to bare arms.
Bears (Halifax)
Fairytale popular in the Halifax area: Goldilocks and the Three Bayers.
Beat (Food)
My salad just can't be beet.
Beater [old car] (Cars)
I should call my car "Egg" because it's an old beater.
Beaver Ton (Canada)
What do you call 2000 pounds of beavers? A Beaverton.
Bee Gee singers (Book Titles)
The Disco Craze: B. G. Singers JG
Bee grudge (Tom Swifties)
"Ouch! When I get stung, I want revenge," said Tom begrudgingly.
Bee late (Tom Swifties)
"This flower's empty," the drone said belatedly.
Beef (Food)
"I want to complain about this meat!" "Okay, what's your beef?"
Beef [complain] (Tom Swifties)
"This meat is hard to chew," Tom beefed jerkily.
Bee-guile (Tom Swifties)
"I'm sure we can fool them into thinking this is pollen," said Tom beguilingly.
Been (Food)
An ex-vegetarian can be described as a has-bean.
Been Gassy (Africa)
"Why did you eat all that Beano?" "I've Benghazi."
Been In (Africa)
I have Benin Africa for quite a while.
Beet Oven (Music)
The best place for a composer to bake beets is the Beethoven.
Beet root (Book Titles)
Red Vegetables: B. Troot6
Beetle Juice (Astronomy)
The drink made from crushed insects: Betelgeuse.
Behave (Book Titles)
Kindergarten Kop II: Bea Hayve JG
Behind (Misc)
Did you hear what happened when the butcher backed into the meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work.
Behind Bars (Expressions)
Why are people who serve drinks imprisoned by their jobs? Because they're behind bars.
Belch (Tom Swifties)
"I am NOT full of hot air," Tom belched.
Believe ya (South America)
You're such a liar, that even if you told the truth, nobody would Bolivia.
Bell Grade (Europe: Balkans)
Where are chimes rated? Belgrade.
Bell in the water (Book Titles)
Ringing Wet: Belinda WaterA
Bell Ringer (Book Titles)
The Life of Quasimodo: Belle Ringer
Bellows [for fire] (Tom Swifties)
"The fire's going out!" Tom bellowed.
Beluga (Animals)
What colour are whales? Blue-ga.
Ben Seen (Chemistry)
"I want to report Ben as a missing person." "OK, where was benzene last?"
Beneficiary (Book Titles)
I Love Wills: Benny Fishery
Benevolent (Book Titles)
Good Works: Ben Evolent6
Benign (Redefinitions)
What you will be after you are eight.
Bering (Misc)
He looked at the map to get a Bering on his direction.
Berth above (Book Titles)
The Pullman Sleeper: Bertha Buv JG
Best wishes (Book Titles)
Lotsa Luck: Bess Twishes JG
Bet He (Names)
"I bet Joe will propose to her tonight." "I Betty will too."
Better (Greek Letters)
These Greek alphabet jokes don't get any beta.
Bey On Nut (Military)
A painting of the Bey of Tunis sitting on a cashew was called "bayonet".
Bi Cuss (Dentist)
A tooth that leads an alternative lifestyle focused on swearing is a bicuspid.
Bi[sexual]-Czar (Tom Swifties)
"Rasputin and I are lovers," said Nicholas bizarrely.
Bic [pen] (Tom Swifties)
"Why shouldn't I stir my yogurt with a ballpoint pen?" Tom bickered.
Bigger (Chemistry)
Motto of land developer: beaker is better.
Bill (Names)
This guy gets put through mail slots: Bill.
Bill Fast (Europe: United Kingdom)
"Bill wants the report now!" "OK, I'll get it to Belfast."
Billboard (Book Titles)
Uninteresting Road Signs: Bill Bored
Billfold [wallet] (Book Titles)
Where to Put Your Money: Bill Fold k
Billiard Ball (Hot Cross Puns)
What do you get when you cross Telly Sevalas with a pool table? A billiard bald.
Billings (USA)
Billings is known as the "Invoice Capital of the U.S.A."
Billionare (Book Titles)
Rich People: Belle Yenere i
Bills to Pay (Jokes)
"Have you got bills to pay? If you do, please give it back. He looks silly bald." (Laugh-In)
Binding (Tom Swifties)
"I got tied up in traffic," said Tom bindingly.OK
Birthday (One-Liners)
When a ship comes into port, it gets a little older because it's a berthday.
Bite (1) (Cannibals)
The computer cannibal chops his programs into byte-size pieces.
Bite (2) (Physical)
The oceanographer's bark is worse than his bight.
Biting (Tom Swifties)
"I hate computers!" exclaimed Tom bytingly.
Bitter (Tom Swifties)
"This apple is sour!" said Tom bitterly.
Biz Mark (USA)
The grade of a school of business administration is a Bismark.
Blank (1) (Tom Swifties)
" ," said Tom blankly.
Blank (2) (Tom Swifties)
"Those bullets can't hurt me," said Tom blankly.
Blank Stair (Tom Swifties)
"I've only enough carpet for the hall and landing," said Tom with a blank stare.
Blazers (Clothing)
Firefighters prefer to wear blazers.
Bleachers (Baseball)
Baseball fans who make their hair unnaturally blonde are bleachers.
Block (Cars)
A mechanic's idea of exercise is jogging around the (engine) block.
Blood Bank (Jokes)
Where did the vampire open his savings account? At the blood bank.
Blow Out (One-Liners)
Would you buy a whoopee cushion from a blow-out sale?
Blows (Clothing)
Tailor's lullaby: "...When the wind blouse, the cradle will rock..."
BLT [bacon, lettuce, tomato] (Book Titles)
Golfer's Sandwich: B. L. Tee JG
Blue Toe (Astronomy)
What astronomers have when they get frostbite on their feet: Pluto.
Bluer (Toronto)
As the sun rises, the sky gets Bloor; as it sets, the sky gets blacker.
Blues (Hockey)
The favourite colours of this hockey team are turquoise, aquamarine and navy, because they're Blues.
Blunt (Tom Swifties)
"I need a pencil sharpener," said Tom bluntly.
BO ["Body Odour"] (Chemistry)
Borates stink. They're all about BO.
BO [Body odour] (Book Titles)
Why Do People Avoid Me?: B. O. Problem JG
Bob (Names)
What to call a fellow who floats in the water: Bob.
Bob for apples (Book Titles)
Things To Do At Parties: Bob Frapples JG
Bobby sox (Book Titles)
Teenagers Of The '50's: Bobbie Sox JG
Body (One-Liners)
Off-colour jokes are, for morticians, bawdy humour.
Body Building (One-Liners)
Dr. Frankenstein was a fitness buff, and was really into body building.
Body Spray (One-Liners)
If the folks from The Walking Dead tossed a zombie into a wood chipper, they'd get a perfume: body spray.
Bohemian Rhapsody (Jokes)
If I were to open a sandwich shop with a Queen (the rock group) theme, could I call it Bohemian Wrapsody?
Boil (Physics)
The best way to evaporate water is to Boyle it.
Bold (Tom Swifties)
"I think I'll use a different font," said Tom boldly.
Bond (1) (Chemistry)
Many people wish for the day when a chemist's word was his bond.
Bond (2) (Money)
Britain's secret agent of finance is James Bond.
Book Arrest (Europe: Balkans)
Reading an illegal book can lead to the so-called "Bucharest" by the Thought Police.
Booked (Jokes)
I heard that there's a hot new restaurant in town called The Library. I tried to get reservations, but it was fully booked.
Boom (Tom Swifties)
"My fellow Americans," boomed Ronald Reagan, "I have just signed legislation to outlaw the state of Russia for ever..."
Boomerang (One-Liners)
If a ghost wants to make a comeback, does it use a boo-merang?
Boot Tan (Asia: South)
When a boot (or a ghost) turns brown in the sun, it has a Bhutan.
Boots (Jokes)
What scary things do ghosts wear on their feet? Boots.
Booze (Jokes)
Are ghosts alcoholics because they like boos?
Bore (Tom Swifties)
"I still haven't struck oil," said Tom boringly.
Bored Stiff (Expressions)
When the mortician died while doing carpentry, he became a board stiff.
Boring (1) (Book Titles)
My Boring Career: A. Drillerp
Boring (2) (Animals)
It is tiresome when a snake starts swallowing its tail because it becomes a boa-ring.
Boron (Chemistry)
If a dumb student is a moron, is a boring chemistry prof a boron?
Boss Need A (Europe: Balkans)
"Does the Bosnia Tylenol?" "Yes, the boss has a big headache after that meeting."
Boss Pour Us (Asia: Turkey)
During "Role Reversal Day", the boss can be ordered around. For example: "Bosporous all a cup of coffee."
Bought (Money)
We went to Thailand for a vacation and baht a lot of ties.
Bound to Be (One-Liners)
Mummies are bound to be uptight.
Bounty [Mutiny on the] (Tom Swifties)
"This is mutiny!" said Tom bountifully.
Bouquet (One-Liners)
A Halloween flower arrangement is a boo-quet.
Bovine (Animals)
Cows don't grow on trees, they grow on bo-vines.
Bow and arrow (Book Titles)
Archery: Beau N. Arrowb
Bow Tie (One-Liners)
While on board a ship, I wear a boat-tie.
Bowled (Sports)
He was so startled by his spare that he was bowled over.
Bowled Over (USA)
When Jack met Jill, he Boulder over with his charm and wit.
Boy Ant (Tom Swifties)
"That young insect is male," said Tom buoyantly.
Boys (USA)
Me and the Boise went out for a beer.
Bragg [Fort] (Tom Swifties)
"My ancestor was a famous Confederate general who had an army fort named after him," Tom bragged.
Brains vs Brawn (Expressions)
The Braun company makes electric razors. If they made a promotional video for a hair clipper for donkeys, would it it be called "Brayin vs Braun"?
Branches (Trees/Shrubs)
The Tree Bank has many branches to serve you.
Branding Irons (Book Titles)
The Last Roundup: Brandon Irons JG
Bra's Ill (South America)
You have a sick brassiere? Yes, my Brazil.
Brave [Native American] (Tom Swifties)
"I ain't afraid of those white men," said Cochise bravely.
Brawn (Chemistry)
Metallurgists are a balanced bunch - they have both brains and bronze.
Braying (Anatomy)
Why are noisy donkeys smart? Because of their great brain.
Break (Cars)
"Sorry, no discounts on repairs!" "Aw, gimme a brake!"
Break Into (One-Liners)
I break into song if I can't find the key. Musical theatre is a great place for burglars. People are always breaking into song.
Breakdown (Cars)
That car has a high-strung disposition. It might have a nervous breakdown if mistreated.
Breast (Europe: France)
It is difficult to keep a-Brest of all the new developments in Geography.
Breathless (Tom Swifties)
"Now no-one can detect my halitosis," said Tom breathlessly.
Brewster (Animals)
Can we call a chicken making beer a brooster?
Bridge [dental] (Dentist)
A dentist's favourite song is "Bridge over Troubled Waters". A dentist's favourite movies are "A Bridge too Far", The Bridge Over the River Kwai" and "The Bridges of Madison County".
Bridle (Tom Swifties)
"Nay!" Tom bridled hoarsely.
Brie fly (Tom Swifties)
"There's a blood-sucking insect in my French cheese," said Tom briefly.
Briefly (Tom Swifties)
"My underpants are too small," said Tom briefly.OK
Bries [Plural of Brie cheese] (Food)
Winds can be cheeses, if they're a breeze.
Bright (1) (Tom Swifties)
"Eating uranium can cause strange effects," said Tom brightly.
Bright (2) (Tom Swifties)
"Many hands make light work," said Tom brightly.
Brisk [brand of iced tea] (Tom Swifties)
"Take tea and see," said Tom briskly.
Bristle (Tom Swifties)
"Use your own hair brush," Tom bristled.
Broke (Music)
When a musician has no money, he/she is Baroque.
Broke Into (Misc)
He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
Broke it Off (Expressions)
She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.
Brook (Physical)
The jealous physical geography prof would brook no rivals.
Browns (Football)
If musicians sing the blues, couch potatoes must sing the Browns.
Brush (Tom Swifties)
"Get out of my hair," was Tom's brush-off.
Brush Up (Dentist)
Dentists don't review before a test, they brush up on the material.
Brussels Sprout (Book Titles)
Small Vegetables: Russell Sprout JG
Buck an Ears (Football)
To raise money for the team, its players sell corn for $1 an ear, hence the team name Buccaneers.
Bud A Pest (Europe: Eastern)
"Budapest? Not at all! He's the nicest guy I know!"
Buddy System (Book Titles)
Prevent Drowning: Buddy System JG
Budget (Misc)
You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
Budweiser beer (Book Titles)
Smart Beer Making: Bud Wiser
Buffet Dinner (Book Titles)
The Smorgasbord: Buffy Dinner JG
Bug (Europe: Eastern)
The Bug river is known for its variety of insects.
Bugs (Jokes)
What do you call a rabbit with fleas? Bugs Bunny.
Build your own (Book Titles)
House Construction: Bill Jerome Holme 6
Building (Book Titles)
Houses, Offices, and Apartments: Bill Ding
Bull [market] (Tom Swifties)
"The stock market's going up," said Tom bullishly.
Bumper (Cars)
She wouldn't get out of the way, so I had to bumper to let her know I wanted in.
Buoyant (Jokes)
How can you tell if an ant is male or female? Drop it in water. If it sinks, it's a girl ant. If it floats, it's a boy ant.
Burb Bank (USA)
The 'Burbs Savings and Loan Company is located in Burbank.
Burden (Names)
I never want to be a Burton on society.
Burn (Europe: Switzerland)
If I make one more pun about Switzerland, they'll Bern me alive.
Burn A (Asia: South)
To Burma house down on purpose is considered a crime.
Burn A Bee (Canada)
"I like to burn wasp nests!" "You must be from Burnaby."
Burn a Debt (Book Titles)
Celebrate the End of Your Mortgage!: Bernadette Party
Burnout (One-Liners)
Do overstressed firefighters suffer from burnout?
Bury (1) (Canada)
Let us make peace, Barrie the hatchet and get on with life.
Bury (2) (Names)
A good name for a gravedigger: Barry.
Bury 'em (1) (Chemistry)
When a Chemistry prof dies, we have a funeral, then barium.
Bury 'em (2) (Book Titles)
We Won 20-1!: Barry Um JG
Bus [computer] (Tom Swifties)
"We don't have room for any more peripherals," said Tom bus-ily.
Bush (Measures)
The unit of shrub volume should be the bushel.
Business (Chemistry)
In spite of the bank robbery, it was bismuth as usual.
Bust [female] (Tom Swifties)
"You're busted!" said the policeman to Miss Parton.
Buster Crabbe [actor] (Book Titles)
Smash His Lobster!: Buster Crabbe
Butter Fly (Jokes)
Why did Silly Billy throw butter out a window? He wanted to see a butterfly.
Buy Cal (Asia)
"What shall we get Cal for Christmas?" "Let's Baikal an atlas."
Buy Sepps (Anatomy)
"Mr. Sepps is thirsty!" "Well, biceps a drink!"
Buy Some (Animals)
"You've run out of buffalo steaks? Go out and bison, then!"
Buy You (Physical)
Geographer bar talk: "Hello handsome. Let me bayou a drink."
Buzz cut (Book Titles)
Trim Those Sideburns Too?: Buzz Cutt JG
Bye, son (Jokes)
What did the buffalo say when he sent his son to college? Bison.
Byte (Tom Swifties)
"These bit patterns will be more readable in groups of 8," said Tom bitingly.

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