- Jack it (Clothing)
- When your car gets a flat tire, you have to jacket up before you can change it.
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- Jacobs Ladder (Book Titles)
- Fingerplay: Jacob SladderJG
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- Jaded (Tom Swifties)
- "My Chinese necklace has been stolen," said Mary jadedly.
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- Jam (Jokes)
- Speaking of making preserves, I tried making door jamb once, but it wasn't very good. People kept slamming it.
When is a gun like a sandwich? When it is jammed.
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- Jamming (Two-Liners)
- Why is there music coming from the printer? The paper is jamming again.
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- Jane (Measures)
- "Me Tarzan, you chain."
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- Janice Cooks (Book Titles)
- Renowned Chefs: Janice Cooksw
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- Janitor (Book Titles: Good)
- I Cleaned Up This Town!: Janet Orr
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- January (Book Titles)
- The Dead Of Winter: Jan YuaryJG
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- Jaw-Dropping (Undead)
- For a zombie, every surprise is jaw-dropping.
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- Je M'Appelle (Book Titles: Good)
- How to Introduce Yourself in French: Gemma Pelle
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- Jean-Claude van Damme (Two-Liners)
- A major martial arts actor in Waterworld is Jean-Claude van Damp. He made quite a splash in Hollywood!
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- Jekyll and Hyde (Book Titles: Good)
- Split Personalities: Jacqueline HydeJG
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- Jerry-Rig (Book Titles)
- I Can Fix It: Jerry RiggJG
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- Jersey (Europe: United Kingdom)
- On the island of Jersey, one may see cows wearing shirts.
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- Jest-Stick (Tom Swifties)
- "I won't be on time for the Christmas party because some joker put glue on the bottoms of my shoes," Tom gesticulated.
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- Jet Fuel (Book Titles)
- What Makes Airplanes Go: Jeff FuelJG
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- Jew Ant (Tom Swifties)
- "The insect in William's hand is wearing a yarmulka!" said Tom jubilantly.
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- Jew Dish (Tom Swifties)
- "Let's eat kosher tonight," said Tom judiciously.
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- Jew Dough (Redefinitions)
- Judo: What you can find in a kosher bakery.
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- Jew Lip (Redefinitions)
- Julep: Backtalk given to a rabbi.
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- Jew Nipper (Plants)
- My dog bit the rabbi, so I called him Juniper.
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- Jewels Sparkle (Book Titles)
- I Work with Diamonds: Jules Sparkle
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- Jib Bootie (Africa)
- A person who makes footwear from sailcloth could be from Djibouti.
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- Jig Saw (Redefinitions)
- If you need to cut wood while dancing, use a jigsaw.
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- Jimmy the Lock (Book Titles)
- How to Break In: Jimmy De LockJG
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- Job Well Done (Expressions)
- Acupuncture is a jab well done. That's the point of it.
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- Jock Itch (Book Titles)
- Don't Do Anything Rash: Jacques ItchJG
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- Jock Strap (Book Titles)
- Athletic Supporter: Jacques Strapl
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- Jogged (One-Liners)
- I had forgotten how to run, but a trainer jogged my memory.
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- Johnny Cake (Book Titles)
- How to Make Cornmeal Pancakes: Johnny CakeJG
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- Joint (Anatomy)
- Ken and Joyce's Knee and Hip Surgeons, Inc. is a joint operation.
"Your meat, madam!" announced the two butcher boys jointly.
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- Joint [marijuana] (Expressions)
- My grandma told me that her joints are getting weaker, so I told her to roll them tighter.Pun.me
Marijuana Osteopathic Surgeons, Inc. is a joint operation.
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- Joked (Tom Swifties)
- "You've got to be egging me on," yolked Tom.
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- Joker (Book Titles)
- Those Funny Dogs: Joe Kerr
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- Jostle and Shove (Book Titles)
- The Rowdy Crowd: Jocelyn Shove
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- Joust (Tom Swifties)
- "Why do they burn aromatic substances at these tournaments?" asked Tom, justly incensed.
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- Jovial (Tom Swifties)
- "I plan to start a cattle ranch in a space station orbiting Jupiter," said Tom jovially.
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- Judgement (Book Titles)
- Life is a Trial: Judd GementJG
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- Juilliard [Academy] (Book Titles)
- Measuring Musical Aptitude: Julie Yard
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- Jump Higher (Jokes)
- Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course. Houses can't jump.
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- Jumped At (Expressions)
- I was offered free lessons at the Skydiving Academy. I jumped at the chance.
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- Jumping Jack Flash [song] (Music)
- I was doing jumping jacks when my pants fell down. That's how I became known as Jumping Jack Flash.
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- Jumpsuit (Clothing)
- What to wear when you want to take a flying leap: Jumpsuit.
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- June (Tom Swifties)
- "I always stammer just before July," was Tom's jejune explanation.
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- Jurisprudent (Tom Swifties)
- "After the trial I sold a dozen pieces of the rock," said the insurance salesman jurisprudently.
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- Just a Canadian (Book Titles)
- From the Great White North: Jessica NadianJG
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- Just a Peek! (USA)
- "Aw, c'mon! Chesapeake?" "No! Not until Christmas!"
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- Just Do It (Book Titles: Good)
- The History of the Nike Slogan: Jess DeWitt
If Nike were to start marketing to singers, would it use the slogan "Just Duet"?
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- Just His Fingers (Book Titles)
- Look Ma, No Thumbs!: Justice FingersA
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- Just Ice (Expressions)
- "Revenge is a dish best served cold." If it were served warm, it would be just water.
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- Just in Case (Book Titles)
- I Need Insurance: Justin Case
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- Just in Time (Book Titles: Good)
- Almost Missed the Bus: Justin Time
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- Just See (Book Titles)
- Birdwatching for Beginners: Jesse the ParrotE
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- Just Us Chickens (Book Titles)
- Poultry Farmers: Justus ChickensJG
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- Justification (Tom Swifties)
- "I like ragged margins," said Tom without justification.
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- Juvenile (One-Liners)
- Many Roman poets were mature, but one was Juvenal.
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